Friday, July 12, 2013

The Amazing Ginger Simpson!

Welcome Readers,
Please join me today to welcome the most wonderful romance author and one of my best friends, Ginger Simpson. I've had the pleasure to work with this lady a few times over the years and she's taught me so much about the publishing world. Her books simply terrific. Please leave Miz Ging a comment!

My latest release is Culture Shock.

Faulty wiring can cause a lot more than a power outage.

The annoying alarm sounded. Alex awoke with a terrible stomachache. Not the start to the day he had hoped for since he spent all evening helping Cynthia clean up the mess from the break-in and listening to her berate his actions. Hopefully, the crime had been the act of a random burglar. He'd worried all night it might have been more, but his concern at the moment was this awful pain. He grasped his belly as the aching intensified.
Forcing himself out of bed, he stumbled to the bathroom. When he used the toilet tissue, a crimson stain caught his attention. "Oh, my God, what's wrong?"
Despite his heart climbing into his throat, he managed to draw in a deep breath. The cause of the blood dawned on him, he was having a period. "Oh for Christ's sake, I don't believe this." He looked upward. "Why do you hate me?"
Luckily, he wasn't totally ignorant. After all, he'd lived with a woman before, and there was absolutely nothing that wasn't advertised on TV these days. Nothing was sacred. How many times had he been forced to watch tampon commercials and other feminine hygiene products?
Rummaging under the sink, he searched for whatever it was Cynthia used during her monthly. He found the very item he'd seen advertised so often. Pulling a cylinder from the box, he grimaced and began reading the instructions on the back of the carton.
He squinted at the small print. "Warning: Do not insert cardboard cylinder." That seemed rather obvious to him, but then hairdryers came with warnings not to use them in the bathtub or shower. Obviously there were some ignorant people in the world.
But ... what the hell did he do with the string? He dangled the tampon in the air and studied it for a moment, then following the diagram, he propped one foot on the closed toilet lid, but hesitated. "I can't do this." How did a woman…especially one with long talons?
Reality gave him a stern reminder. Using the tampon was a necessary evil given his situation. With clenched teeth and squinted eyes, he probed for an opening and inserted the cotton torpedo, leaving the string dangling for removal.  A queasy feeling seized him, and he plopped down on the commode. This was the last time he was going through this torture. He had to find a way to get back into his own skin and the comfort he missed so much.

Cynthia stopped by on her way to work and found Alex, still clad in a bathrobe and, curled in a fetal position on the couch. She arched a brow at him. "Why aren't you ready to go?"
He glared up at her. "You started your period. My stomach is killing me."
"Oh, is that all?" She clucked her tongue against her teeth. "It's called cramps. Now you know what it feels like. Get up and get dressed."
He adjusted his position and closed his eyes. "I'd prefer not to. I think I'm dying."
She bent over and shoved her face close to his. "No one ever died of cramps. Get up!"
"I can't," he whined.
"You're pathetic!" She straightened and shook her head. "Good thing you aren't pregnant. I've always heard that if men were the child bearers, every family would only have one. I don't think you'd live through the first birth. I never realized what a wimp you are."

Buy Link:  http://www.amazon.com/author/gingersimpson

9 comments:

Tabitha Shay said...

Welcome, Ginger,
Sorry I'm running so late, but for some reason, I couldn't sign on to my own blog site...Couldn't fix the white because I couldn't get back on...Love your book and the cover. Best of luck, my friend....

Unknown said...

OMG!!! I love the excerpt! So hilarious!

Unknown said...

Thanks for hosting me,Tabs. I hope you realize I share the same sentiment about you. I find it strange that readers can't see that authors are voracious readers and have peers who have served as inspirations.

Molly Daniels said...

I absolutely LOVE this!! Ginger Simpson strikes again:)

*hurries off to buy it*

Unknown said...

Thanks for visiting Diana and Molly, and for loving my story. I sure had fun writing it.

Destiny Blaine said...

Hilarious excerpt. Great job, Ginger. I can't wait to read your latest.
Tabs~Your blog looks fantastic!

Destiny Blaine

Rita Karnopp said...

Getting ready for floating on the Missouri . . . having a great vacation with hubby, Mother, daughter and grandson!

This book sounds absolutely a hoot and I look forward to reading it.
hugs, Rita

Tabitha Shay said...

By the way, your excerpt is great! I've got to buy this book and find out what happens...

Unknown said...

Thanks for the encouraging comments, gals. I appreciate that you stopped by.